If you feel called to be a leader … You’re invited to join a deeper #metoo movement

The massive uprising of women taking to the streets feels exhilarating… “This time, we won’t back down. This time, we’re calling a halt to men abusing their power over us in this #metoo movement. This time we’re gonna make it stick. We won’t have to fight for these rights again.”

I dare to say that while it might make us feel good to call out male perpetrators and declare, ‘We’re done with this… It’s time for a change!’ … I say that unless and until we take the next step of creating a deeper #metoo movement nothing will really change.

I was actively involved in the women’s movement since 1973, and was an organizer for the Los Angeles Women Take Back the Night march in 1980. 5,000 women and men marched down Hollywood Blvd chanting, shouting, Stop the Violence Against Women. There were speeches and singing and we all felt this tremendous solidarity. A new time was upon us and we were proud and happy to be a part of it. That was only one march of many all across the country.

So how come we’re still needing to rally around this same cause 38 years later?

I believe part of the reason is that we women were afraid to speak about our own abuse of power. Leading up to the Take Back the Night march, there were several events around town including a discussion on violence against women. One brave young women raised her hand and asked “What about when women are violent? My mother abused me for years. How do I deal with that?”

The discussion leaders had no way to respond. They said they were sorry she experienced that, but now they were focused on men being violent to women. And they dropped the conversation. Except for occasional articles over the years, we swept the idea of women ourselves being abusers under the rug indefinitely. And this locked us into a Victim stance that is alive and well today.

In defense of that position, I would say it was all we could take on at that point in the women’s movement. We had to process our own anger and pain around the weight of evidence coming out around the position women held in society; from the staggering numbers of rape and battering to not being able to get a credit card in our own name. It was the first level of healing and was vitally important.

And for many women today, it is still relevant. I am not denying that at all. But until we are each ready to do our own #metoo work, we keep pointing the finger outward and stay stuck in our victim stance. “Look what you did to me.” “Look what you did to us!”

As much as I denied that I saw myself as a victim, up until a few short months ago, I would have seen all these revelations coming out of this current #metoo movement as further proof that men are somehow more abusive than women. On the surface of things, that seems to be true. At a deeper level it is not.

I invite you to not turn away from this message. For it is ultimately a gentle calling for you to consider.

And please don’t get me wrong on this point. Indeed, for anyone – female or male – who was traumatized through any kind of sexual or emotional abuse, my heart goes out to you. There is healing to do. And honoring the pain you experienced. This is part of your life experience and I don’t take it lightly. I’ve been there myself and I would say most of us have our own stories to tell. At the same time, many of us have processed old wounds and painful past events.  

Now, it is time to look deeper.  

To shine the light inward and have the courage to claim our own #metoo moments. As long as we point the finger outward at men, women are allowed to deny the places in us where we too abuse our power, including our sexual power. It also keeps us pitted against men and makes it very hard to hear their stories, their point of view. For they are not all predators.

In 2018 our understanding of who we all are as energetic beings is far more advanced than the era of the 1970s and 80s when the women’s movement was most active.  There is greater public awareness about consciousness, energy healing, the effects of emotions on our health, finances, and relationships.

Even if we’re not quite ready to jump into this 100%…

• We know we are each ultimately responsible for our own life
• That we can’t really change anyone but our self
• And if we’re honest, we know we are all #metoo

The more we can be kind, gentle and compassionate to all the parts of us – the parts we love and the parts we try so hard to deny – the more compassion we send outward to others who also lost their way over the years. One of the best ways women can heal the rift between men and women in the world is to begin a dialogue with the masculine parts of themselves.

Unity consciousness starts inside you.

Healing the inner divide between your male and female parts – that you might not even know is there – affects everyone around you. Being a leader means doing the work first. If this message resonates with you at all and you’d like to talk about it further, leave a comment below. Let’s start a conversation. You can also find out much more information in my free guide Meet Your Sacred Masculine.

This was originally published in Linda Kaun ~ The Power of You.